into the curve, the curve a devil's handiwork,
with Worsenski ahead of me, two hundred sixty
pounds, one hundred pounds more than me,
and all I could see were the Converse soles
of a boy I dusted in my dreams on the bus
out here to make the track team, letters
for my sweater, girls going goo-goo over me,
coaches from big-league schools with papers
to say I was headed for glory, my unkempt
disappointment in me now sealed by winged
feet beating me in the curve, Worsenski as big
as the USS Enterprise sliding through Pacific
waters, parting the air in front of him that
sucked back behind just to hold me in my grip
of deep shame until I wished I were not there.
I wanted more than being human, a warrior
of field and track would be bursting out now
ripping open my chest with masculinity
to make Jesse Owens proud or jealous,
or inspired or something other than me
the pulling-up caboose slower than mud
running like an old man really walking,
all the most valuable parts of me inside
my brain in wishes, in dreams, in things
not yet born into the world, in calculations
of beauty, in yearning for love, for the word
of love, for some adoration from Wanda,
the most beautiful girl in the whole block,
black like me and wondering just what
life had to give those of us who can fly.